You Are Not Alone: Five Powerhouse Ladies Tell the Truth About Anxiety

September 14, 2011

Fetal Beach

Sometimes when anxiety is rearing it’s nasty head I just want to curl up in the fetal position and hide from the world. I feel restless for no apparent reason and keep putting things off because I just can’t focus, which often just compounds my worried feelings.

For a long time I thought I was the only one that ever felt like this. I thought I was a freak that for some reason couldn’t manage life – even a really great life – like everyone else seemed able to do. I thought I was alone. Maybe you’ve felt like that before. Maybe you feel like that right now.

Well, get ready to feel like a normal woman who belongs to a successful, yet sometimes anxiety-battling tribe. I’ve rounded up five amazing, unique, talented women to share with you how it feels when anxiety is knocking on their doors AND best of all they share some tips for dealing with anxiety.

How does anxiety manifest in you (feelings, sensations, physical responses, behavior changes)?



Jenny Bones: While I have been able to overcome the debilitating depression brought on by early-childhood trauma, I’ve never been able to fully be rid of my anxiety symptoms. It ranges from just feeling tense/nervous to feeling like I’m having a heart attack. There’s nothing more embarrassing than being told by an emergency room nurse that you’re not dying…you just need a Valium. Oy!



Tara Wagner: For me it’s that tightening in my chest or that “restless” shiver that runs through me leaving me just wanting to throw it all away from me. It might feel like weariness or even distraction, when I just can’t handle it all anymore. Usually it’s just that chaotic flurry of thoughts in my head that make me want to pull my hair out.



Ash Ambirge: Anxiety is a mother. I typically get anxious when I feel like I’ve got too many balls in the air, and I can’t keep up with them all. And unfortunately, my body’s coping mechanisms seem to be to just shut down, as in, my brain gets foggy, I can’t concentrate, and I procrastinate the hell out of everything, which only further exasperates the problem. :)  It’s incredibly demotivating, and frankly, I don’t have the patience for it. 



Melissa Gorzelanczyk: Anxiety feels like I’m losing control. I feel I’m not getting enough air and taking deep breaths does nothing to change that. It makes simple requests or problems seem bigger and more irritating. If it happens at night, it’s hard to fall asleep. My mind seems like it’s racing with everything I need to do.



Tammy Strobel: For a longtime my anxiety manifested itself in a very unhealthy way. I spent about 10 years battling an eating disorder. And there were all kinds of physical aliments and emotional ups and downs associated with the disorder.

For the full backstory you can read this post: Empowerment is Not for Sale


What strategies do you use to move past anxiety when it arises?


Jenny Bones: When I eat right, drink less coffee, take in plenty of water and get outside I experience far less anxiety. Daily meditation is absolutely critical. I have a quick-and-easy breathing meditation I use if I’m out and begin to experience symptoms. I take slow deep breaths in, then release them slowly while silently chanting a personal mantra. This tends to anchor me back into the present moment and allows my lizard brain to slow down the “fight or flight” response that’s actually causing the anxiety.

Anxiety can be a self-feeding cascade. When we feel it coming on, we get tense and the symptoms get worse. I find it’s useful to always remind myself that these feelings are simply caused by a biochemical reaction and that I can literally just breath through it until the symptoms subside.



Tara Wagner: The practical do-this strategies depends on what the trigger is, but my first step is always back. As I take a step back I remind myself that everything I experience first starts within myself. So I DIG IN to that to understand it deeper and really heal it. When I am feeling calm, clear and reconnected I can see my next step forward…maybe re-prioritizing, filling my own cup or taking a break.



Ash Ambirge: Unfortunately, this is still not my strong suit – I’ve been experimenting with new things, but mostly, I’ve found the most success with cutting myself some slack, and realizing that I am *not* superwoman, and it’s *okay* if I can’t get everything done in one day. Once I give myself that reality check, and remind myself that nothing is life or death, it allows me to focus on one task at hand, and stick with that – rather than freaking out in my head about everything that needs to get done…and then not getting anything done as a result.



Melissa Gorzelanczyk: First of all, I recognize what’s happening. In the past, I tried to ignore what I was feeling, since no one wants to be out of control. Next, pinpoint triggers so you know why this is happening. For me, I realized my life was too busy. I needed to slow down and one way I’ve done that is by getting out of debt so I can work from home. If you have anxiety, find ways to simplify your life and schedule. Exercise is another awesome way to get back on track. A simple walk or run by myself can change the whole day. If I’m having trouble sleeping, meditating for five or more minutes really helps.



Tammy Strobel: I’m healthy now and have learned to manage my anxiety by:

- Meditating
- Practicing Yoga
- Writing

Finally, if your anxiety is getting to the point where you can’t function seek help.
There is no shame in seeking counseling for a problem.



Woo! Don’t you feel so much better already? Not only is it a relief to realize other women have similar concerns and worries, but now you have a whole new arsenal of techniques for getting rid of anxiety the next time it shows up on the doorstep.

I want to reiterate, though, what Tammy said and encourage anyone suffering from any sort of debilitating anxiety or depression to seek professional help – there is seriously no shame in that.

I also want to thank these women for having the courage and kindness to be honest about an often overlooked topic. When we share our true experiences we find a community, a safety-net, and a box full of useful tools.

Please help expand the community and safety-net by sharing this post. Thanks!

Photo by sportpictures.

 

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{ 12 comments… read them below or add one }

Tammy Strobel September 15, 2011 at 7:12 am

Thanks for including me in the post! :) All of these ladies are inspiring!

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Mallory September 16, 2011 at 10:57 pm

Thank you for participating, Tammy! It is so inspirational to see amazing gals like yourself be so open.

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Deidre September 15, 2011 at 8:11 am

Thanks for taking the taboo out of talking about anxiety!!

I also take Vit D, tyrosine, & 5HTP. In conjunction with daily journaling (so I can see when I am headed “off the rails”) & keeping up with my regular workouts to decompress. Having a supportive family & friendship network that is understanding when I’m not presenting my best “self” is key for me as well.

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Mallory September 16, 2011 at 10:59 pm

Oh yeah, having supportive people that understand is so important. I think it’s really freeing to have those people in your life that you know won’t judge your whole person based on some anxiety-driven moments or behaviors. Thanks for sharing all this with us, Deidre!

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Jenny September 15, 2011 at 10:09 am

What a list to be included in! Thank you for this opportunity, Mallory. Great post and a topic near-and-dear to my heart. xoxoxo

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Mallory September 16, 2011 at 11:00 pm

You are such a talented and inspiring lady, Jenny, and I so appreciate you participating here. Thanks!

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Courtney | The Rule Breaker's Club September 16, 2011 at 9:15 am

This is fantastic!

Suffering from anxiety was a catalyst for a huge career change for me. I think it’s a lifelong journey, but it’s always good to know that you’re not alone!

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Mallory September 16, 2011 at 11:01 pm

Thanks for the comment, Courtney. I totally agree that it’s a life long journey and am glad to help you realize how un-alone you are with any feelings of anxiety :)

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sunny mcnairs June 9, 2012 at 2:01 pm

It’s never been this bad. I’ve been holding on for dear life to the end of the rope I’m dangling from and, I might be mistaken here but at the the same time I’m pretty sure, the other end of this isn’t attached to ANYTHING…

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Mallory June 9, 2012 at 7:35 pm

I’m so sorry to hear that you’re having a hard time, Sunny. I hope it helps to know that you have support, love and positive energy flowing your way right now.

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Debbi January 2, 2013 at 9:40 pm

Thank you so much for posting this! I have been battling extreme anxiety for the past couple of years and it has been difficult to say the least. It helps to know that I’m not alone or not crazy. This has been positive and uplifting, thanks again!

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Mallory January 3, 2013 at 7:53 am

You’re definitely not alone or crazy, Debbi – anxiety is one of those things that pretty much everyone deals and almost no one talks about. I’m glad this gave you a positive boost and I wish you the best in this new year:)

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