Like I said before, there are four barriers or false beliefs that often leave people stuck – unable to find their joy, unable to move forward, unable to live up to their full potential.
As is explained in The Big Leap these false beliefs hold your upper limit problem in place and cause you to have misunderstandings about who you actually are. Once these barriers are removed, you’ll be free to move forward and invent the life you want.
As you read the following four false beliefs try to evaluate yourself and see if any of these are holding you back.
- Feeling Fundamentally Flawed – The book explains this as having “a deep, old feeling that there’s something wrong, bad, or flawed about you.” Perhaps you don’t consciously think this all the time, but you may find yourself struggling with this when you get a promotion or love someone, because ultimately you don’t believe someone so deeply flawed deserves something so great. Even more importantly, this fear brings with it a related fear. “It’s the fear that if you did make a full commitment to living in your Zone of Genius, you might fail. It’s the belief that even your genius is flawed, and that if you expressed it in a big way, it wouldn’t be good enough. This belief tells you to play it safe and stay small.”
- Disloyalty and Abandonment – This barrier has to do with expectations and rules. The book proposes two questions to help you decide if you suffer from this false belief:
Did I break the family’s spoken or unspoken rules to get where I am?
Even though I am successful, did I fail to meet the expectations my parents had of me?
If this barrier is in your way you may find yourself sabotaging your own success, giving into the familial pressures or feeling bad from the guilt of following your own path.
- Believing that More Success Brings a Bigger Burden – If you don’t have an environment of unconditional love and support, you may feel like a burden. It goes to reason that as you become successful those unsupportive of you in the past, will be particularly put off as you continually gain momentum.
- The Crime of Outshining – I imagine this barrier is extremely prevalent among Americans and gets its start in childhood. Children are praised for excelling, but also given the message that they mustn’t shine too much, or else others my feel bad. As this message is given over and over to children (particularly extremely talented children) they will eventually learn to either “turn down the volume on their genius” or “turn down their volume on the enjoyment of it.” Are these feelings of holding back or dampening your joy, still with you as an adult?
While you can’t expect to immediately get past these barriers, identifying them is the first step. Now that you know what false beliefs have been misguiding who you are, you can start making changes. When you catch yourself holding back or staying away from your genius, pause and take a moment to evaluate which barrier is getting in your way. As you continue to name and identify these barriers, you’ll chip away at their foundation until they no longer hold you back.
Photo by Jamelah.